Dream Job

Quiet enough now today.  Some Danish fellah got his motorbike stuck in the cow gate somehow.  Cross as two sticks he was.

Do you know what I’m only after discovering?  The whole summer I was taking pictures and writing posts about Cidney and Ambrose and the Comiskeys back from Australia for their holidays and all Cidney’s friends in their house share in the Hamptons  and all that and I was saving them all in the drafts folder and no one ever saw them?   Isn’t that gas all the same?  maybe I’ll make an album of the photos.  They have that yoke that does it at the Euro Spar in town.  Make a lovely souvenir for Cidney so it would.  Ambrose could post it to her.  Besotted so he is, the poor unfortunate little gobshite.

The Cliff Experience Reception Experience (Disruptive Innovation in the Prefab Hut Space)

Dream Job

 Terrible pleased altogether to be asked to host this year’s Bloomsday Twiterature, The Definitive Indefinite Article’s 10,000-year project to broadcast the entire of Ulysses 140-characters per year.  I even borrowed Tony Balfe’s drape from when he was in the Showaddywaddy cover band – closest thing I could find to Edwardian garb at short notice.  Anyway.   Last year’s Twiterature was a huge success.  It is nice to get away from the box and watching the Copa America and the Euros and it was great to give the new intern Cidney something to do to go into town and get a copy of Ulysses and keep her out of me hair for a while.  Jaysus she has me driven up the wall complaining about not being able to get Hamptons Houseshare Hell on the telly below at the house or something but that is a whole other day’s work.

martello tower sandycoveSo without further ado, as the many says, I give you Bloomsday Twiterature 2016, a genuine cliffhanger, if I may say so.

then covered the bowl smartly. Back to barracks! he said sternly. He added in a preacher’s tone: For this, O dearly beloved, is the genuine

Dream Job

 In the spirit of synergy and do-more-dynamically-with-dramatically less the Cliff Experience Reception Experience will be (I am informed) synergizing and dovetailing with some other Definitive Indefinite Article properties.  Sure it is like one of those media mergers here.  I can’t keep track of it at all!

 Anyway, apparently I am getting an intern, which is just as well cos no one seems to want the fecking job.  Seems there is a Free-Intern-Included thing with the solar panels I got a while back.  (Shoulda known there’d be a catch!) Some young wan or young fellah called Cidney.  Coming all the way over from America it seems to do an internship in Public Relations with the Cliff Experience Reception Experience.  I just googled Cidney on Ambrose’s phone and it seems she is a young wan who used to be in some blog folleyer upper or something called the Hamptons Houseshare Hell.  I can’t imagine what she would want to be doing away out here handing out flyers for dolphins on an unpaid internship of the summer.  I don’t know how this is going to turn out but she is supposed to be here this weekend.  I suppose she can doss down in one of the unfinished holiday homes with Ambrose for the time being.

The Cliff Experience Reception Experience (Disruptive Innovation in the Prefab Hut Space)

So after like forever? there is some lawyer stuff? goes on? and the Federal case? is kind like not over? but done? and we are all officially defenestrated? or whatever? but I can’t ever talk about it? and anyway it is so boring? and when I get my phone back? first text I open? Madison is having a holiday? reunion? party? so first we all go to Soulcycle together? and it is kind of fun? but gets a little weird? when Thorin? turns up? and has no sports clothes? and borrows Stanstead’s? extra pair of yoga pants? and Brock? and Radcliffe? are instagramming everything? and then Brock? starts instagramming Radcliffe’s instagrams? and she throws her phone at him? and it breaks? and she is so freaked out? that she has look for a phone store? to fix it? And Brock goes with her? and then we all and do shots? at Mixocologie? and then all get tattoos? and then go back to the loft? that Madison’s folks? use whenever they come into the city? for a show? or stuff? and there are lots of other people there? and stuff? and like it’s a bit awkward? there are like these people? who work with people? who are like the people? who take the FERRY? to Martha’s Vineyard? and Jostlin? is now dating this girl Grendell? and they are both? like wearing? Men’s Warehouse suits? and smoking these skinny little purple cigarettes? with gold filters on them? and pretending to talk French? and Meaghghean? and Cidney? are trying to make egg nog? with Cointreau? and Miller Lite? and then Jericho Template arrive? and start playing? and short out the electrics? and Madison loses it? and is all like? my parents are going to kill me? and kicks us all out? and I get stuck in the elevator? with Jostlin, Grendell, Taffte and Nixxon? and Nixxon starts to hyperventilate? so Grendell gets her to sing Feed the World? over and over for three hours? until the firemen come? to let us out and when I get home? my mother is waiting in the lobby of my building? cos her new DJ boyfriend? is doing some gig in Antigua? for the holidays? and she lost her keys? so she will be staying with me? so we are going to binge watch? all of Buffy ever? for the holidays?

Better fun thatn Wii

Instagram?  Moi?

so like I am totally? on jury duty? for this huge Federal case? and am not even supposed to be online? and we are all sequestered? in this hotel which? is kind of awesome? but I have no idea? when I wail get done? so Madison’s cousin? Brock’s girlfriend? Radcliffe? is taking my weekends? until I am done? so that should be fun? cos Brock? and Radcliffe? are going to instagram? every moment? of every weekend? as part of their PhD’s? in Communications?

so like the bass player? from Jericho Turnpike? comes over? with Taffte? after the gig? with a big hookah? and he fires up the hookah? and he says his name is Photon? and Thorin? starts giggling? so hard? that he swallows some part of his sunglasses? and when he calls for help? he sounds like like Elmo? and it is so totally hilarious? until he goes blue? and then Nixxon? gives Thorin? the Heimlich maneuver? and he is OK? and Photon nods? and just says karma? don’t mock the name again? and McKinley? gets all ? Wait your name is Photon? or Karma? and all like Oooooo these aren’t the droids you’re looking for? and then she starts having some kind of weird mini stroke? and Photon? just folds his arms? and says anyone else wanna make fun of the name? and then we are like totally creeped out by him? and everyone goes to bed? and on Sunday? Taffte says she tried to break up with him? on Saturday night? but as soon as she started saying stuff? her throat started to get all dry? and she couldn’t breathe right? and then Thorin? says Enough? and goes upstairs and opens the curtains? and Photon screams? and turns to dust? and then I wake up? and I am still on the deck? and Thorin? and Photon? are firing up the hookah again? and I know I need to totally go lie down?

Caution!  Bishop at Work!

Dude!  This stuff has no effect at all!

And that whole weird

thing? with Taffte? and Nixxon? and Photon?  the bass player guy? and the hookah?

I can’t?

I just can’t?

I can’t even?

I just can’t even?