The Definitive Indefinite Article has agreed sale of the giant silver letters “A”  “I” and “G” to Jai-Alai 3Card Monty LLC.  The letters will be used for the headquarters of Jai-Alai’s new Private Public Partnership, IGA, Insatiable Global Acquisitiveness. 

The Concerned Reader:  And what, may we ask will IGA be doing?  Exporting spandex bikinis to Patagonia? 

TDIA: They will be buying legacy assets for Jai-Alai in a… 

The Concerned Reader: …Legacy Assets!  Legacy my arse!  You mean toxic worthless securitized mortgages that no one would touch with a 40-foot pole, don’t you? 

TDIA: Let’s not quibble over semantics.  Anyway, IGA will purchase legacy assets from Jai Alai to render jai-Alai once again an exemplar of solvent investing and a pillar of the financial industry.

The Concerned Reader: With what will IGA be buying these worthless “legacy” assets?

TDIA: With loans from the government and the FDIC.

The Concerned Reader: And then…?

TDIA: It they turn out to be worth something GIA can sell them and pay the government back and if they turn out to be worthless then GIA never pays back the loan.

The Concerned Reader:  Are you making this crap up?

TDIA: Sadly not.  This is what the grown ups are saying.

The Concerned Reader:  You just made my May Day.  [Sings]

Arise ye starvelings from your slumbers

Arise ye criminals of want

For reason in revolt now thunders

and at last ends the age of cant.

Now away with all your superstitions

Servile masses arise, arise!

We’ll change forthwith the old conditions

And spurn the dust to win the prize.


Then come comrades rally

And the last fight let us face

The Internationale

Unites the human race.