Hedgeer Hemlien Private Equity Investment Consulting - Futurizing tomorrow Now!

In association with: Hedgeer Hemlien Private Equity Investment Consulting – Futurizing Tomorrow Today!

So? the one weekend? I don’t go to the beach? cos I have to go to Boston? for my grandmother’s 99th birthday? (and my mother? makes a complete mess? facetiming? from her writing retreat? in Catalonia?) interesting stuff happens? and I arrive out of Friday night? to find that Taffte? is dating the bass player? in Jericho Template? who play at Mizen 380? on Saturdays? and can’t stop trying to make everyone listen to them? on her phone? until Megghhghennn? gets all: they are just a Psychedelic Furs ripoff? how could you date someone that derivative? and we are all like what? and stuff? and McKinley? is all like? she has an MFA or something? in post punk cultural studies? from Princeton? and Taffte? is all like screw you? and your academic bullshit? but at least she stops making us listen to Jericho Template? which is a BIG relief? cos they suck so bad? And Campbell? texts me? all “awesome! thanks so much? moving to Napa? see ya never?” with a link and it’s Seeley Mildew? in a tutu? pissing on some penthouse floor? playing Born In The USA on a kazoo? and it has 88 million hits? and we all play this drinking game? with Thorin? and whoever loses? has to say Hedgeer Hemlien Preferred Equity Inverted Value Futures? ®*** while standing on one leg? and holding their nose? and it is all fun? until Nixxon passes out? and falls in the pool? but Jostlin gets her out? and it is all ok? sort of?

***Publisher’s note: See! We warned you about the product placement. Wouldn’t you have preferred an ad-free paywall?