May 2015

dogSo like? I’m supposed to get off work early? on Friday? and this witch Ameey? in Positioning Enhancement? calls this 2 o’clock meeting? and I am totally? like seriously? I just can’t? and she is all full of clientside dynamic reintegration? and I just hate her? and her stupid Oberlin face? and I want to vomit? and I don’t get out of there until 5? and I miss my ride with Nixxon? and I have to take the Jitney? and I am so wishing I had decided to go to Montauk? with Jarrtxed? instead? but then I see Brinette? Campbell’s ex? trying to get on the Jitney? and she has 2 huge bags? and I so totally don’t help her? and on Saturday? we grill? but we can’t get the corn done? because this new girl Jocelynn? who seems to be some kind of cousin of Gwendevere’s? has this weird designer pocket dog? that is some kind of Pekinese coyote Alsatian-doodle? or something? and she has the whole stove taken up cos she is cooking seafood risotto? for the stupid dog? and later? we don’t go to Riggers? cos of something Walden? heard from some guy at work? about e-coli? there? so we go to this new place? Mizzen 380? and it is fun until Cidney? gets trashed and starts calling old boyfriends? to break up with them again?


I so like? just can’t? Jarrtxed? (he says the tx is silent?) who I met? at The Zone? during March Madness? and we’ve been kind of like dating? asked me if I wanted in on his summer share in Montauk? and I am all like? that is so far away to go every weekend? and he is all like I thought we were connecting? and it’s only every second weekend? cos it’s a half share? and gets all whiney puppy? and I just can’t? and then Brinette? is hassling me? to pay for the Hamptons Houseshare? cos there is like only one place left? and I am so torn? and conflicted? cos I like Jarrtxed? but I don’t know if I whole-summer? like him? but then my mom? calls me from the airport? and tells me? that even if Jarrtxed’s share was only a quarter share on the Jersey Shore? I should go? and do I think I am getting younger? or what plan do I have for finding a proper boyfriend? and then she has to go cos her flight is leaving? and I say where? and she says writers retreat in Catalonia? and I laugh out loud? and say you’re a writer now? what happened to being a painter?  and she totally hangs up on me?  and then Brinette texts me again? and says Woodrow? has a friend at work? who has no share for the summer? and I need to decide tonight?


Should Our Protagonist spend the summer in :