November 2010

I just saw a truck n the street emblazoned with the sign “DATA SHREDDING SERVICES.”  How exactly to you shred data?  I undestand the princiles of shredding paper but data?

Maybe you take a simple statement like “8 out of 10 cats prefer tuna to chicken” shove it into a big noisy contraption and hit the switch and out comes:

“Feline bootstrap randomization intervals using bias corrected seafood percentiles indicate a regressive boxplot of Poisson regression models for which a non-linear U-shaped relation was seen.  Locally weighted regression indicates recursive tendencies in the log-linear in the predictor variables.”

But what about the other 2 cats, you might ask?  I believe they were collaterally negligated in the excessive whining and grinding of gears as the data got shredded.


Small Investors thank Hedge Fund Runners

You will probably have a hard time remembering Jai-Alai 3Card Monty Bourse Bigote de Barcelona.   (A quick search of this locus for Jai alai will quickly refresh your memory).  Their financial wizardry landed them in regulatory difficulties and they took many of their boutique financial instruments such as their Poverty Deflate Swaps off the market.

During the recent socialist, liberal, effete, elitist witch-hunt Jai-Ala had been quietly working behnd the scenes through its political foundations, pouring millions into the election campaigns of willing and compliant “politicians” who will now create a more hopspitable environment for the kind of go-getting entrepreneurship that made Jai-Alai 3Card Monty Bourse de Barcelona the giant it once was.

Stand by for the launch of Real Income Erosion Futures and  Class-based Asset Class Repurchase Bonds as soon as the richest 2% are relieved of the heinous burden of having to pay their own electric bills.