That’s it?  I’ve been gone since the middle of May and this is all you lot have to show for yourselves?  Twiterature?  I gave you Hedgeer Hemlien and Bigote of Barcelona and you only got one post out of it?  ipuke?  That’s all you could manage while I was away?  

[Silence]

I know you’re all hiding in here somewhere!

The Casual Reader: [Emerging from the conservatory] Uhm, I have to be on my way.  I promised me mother I’d pick her up from the racetrack.

TDIA: Well you were no use at all while I was gone.  And since when do we have a conservatory?

The Casual Reader: Uhm, it used to the the greenhosue but we rebranded.

TDIA: How fabulous!  Where are the rest of them?

The Casual Reader:  Well the Apostate Reader got a sumer job in a cannery in Finland to get money for a Canon Lawyer to get his excommunication going again, The Earnest Reader is in Myrtle Beach with three Cuban ballerinas in spandex bikinis and a duffel bag with $80,ooo in 20’s, and The Concerned Reader is hiding in the basement hoping you will let him live there for a while until he can figure out how to get out of the country without his wife finding him.

TDIA:  He can stay down there.  

The Casual Reader:  So the whole monk thing…?

TDIA:  Not really right for someone as deeply superficial as I.

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