We here at the Definitive Indefinite Article have been very busy since 10 am this morning.  A cohort of 200 of interns, each with a dedicated computer has been tasked with getting me two tickets to Leonard Cohen at Radio City Music hall.  Mysteriously none of these interns, the best and the brightest mouse clickers in the land, could find a single ticket for sale at Ticket Monster’s official website.  


Fortunately one of the interns did find two seats for Leonard Cohan at Radius City Music Hell for the knockdown price of $1,151.26 each so I suppose that will have to do.   Curiously enough the keywords the intern had to type in were “spandex bikini.”  My intern also informs me that Ticket Monster tastefully played an unlicensed version of “Please Don’t Pass Me By” while the transaction was being processed.


Another of our interns offered this piece of allegedly consoling verse:


“I searched hard

On the whorled wide web

For entry to the house of song.

I will stand outside the golden door

And hum to myself

The expensive melodies

I will not hear.”


Needless to say, said intern was immediately sent packing.