The Definitive Indefinite Article: On the advice of our counsel at Donosti, Goikochea, Itxibitxi, Spaider LLC we will no longer be [reads woodenly from prepared statement] casting aspersions on the idea of electric books, their inventors, manufacturers, distributors, purveyors or consumers.  [Sotto voce] Is that enough?

 

Borja Donosti, Esq.: That will be sufficient.  Now, please mind your mouth.  We cannot continually extricate you from these situations that your outspokenness gets you into.  Now I have to go.  I must get that propeller I left in Bilbao.

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: [Short awkward silence] Huh?  Fair enough.  Be seeing you.

 

The Familiar Reader: What did he want?

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: How did you get in?

 

The Familiar Reader: You left the back door open again.

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: Feck!

 

The Familiar Reader: Come here and listen to me now.  Did you see what that Bush fellah was saying about Wall Street being all drunk and now it has a hangover and joking about how there was no housing crisis in Dallas cos his missus was trying to buy a house there.

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: I did see something about that.

 

The Familiar Reader: I was just thinking how curious it was.

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: [Distractedly] You were, were you?

 

The Familiar Reader: Yeah it’s kind of interesting to have a dry drunk who just replaced drink with Jesus without ever really fixing his alcoholism compare Wall Street criminal incompetence to being drunk and a recession to a hangover.  What will be the new Jesus for Wall Street?

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: I have no idea and suspect that my legal counsel would advise me to continue that way.

 

The Familiar Reader: I mean they sell one another exploding mortgages and junk bonds and worthless derivatives until the game blows up and then go crying to Uncle Fed for bailout money.  They get bailed out no one ever gets them to promise not to run with the scissors next time.  Isn’t that odd?  It’s like “I know you didn’t mean to drink 2 bottles of Southern Comfort and then run over the dog and puke all over the living room.  I know you’re sorry now here’s $5 billion, a new corvette and the address of the nearest drive-thru liquor store.”

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: I suppose it is.

 

The Familiar Reader: It’s like his underlying alcoholism has never been dealt with and the innate exploitative wrongness of selling any old piece of worthless shit for what anyone will pay for it has never been dealt with.  It makes them both kind of unstable.

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: And your point is?

 

The Familiar Reader: I don’t know.  Can I borrow a cup of sugar?

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: Up there behind the cat litter.

 

The Familiar Reader: Eh, it’s OK I’ll get some later.  Ciao bacalao!

 

The Definitive Indefinite Article: Ciao bacalao????? 

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